Tree Guys Don’t Know Anything          Paul Hetzler

What is an arborist?

1. What a resident of Ann Arbor, Michigan calls herself/ himself.  

2. A person who has received extensive training in all aspects of tree care.  

3. As opposed to your borist.

Tree topping is:

1. A type of syrup that forest-industry workers prefer on their ice cream.  

2. An incorrect way to reduce a tree’s height, one which leads to a very weak and hazardous tree.  

3. A blend of mud and aquatic plant roots that beavers smear on a tree before they start gnawing.

What is drop-crotch pruning?

1. We don’t want to discuss that kind of thing here. 

2. The correct way to reduce the height of deciduous trees, also known as crown reduction. 

3. A way to modify normal-looking pants to conform to a particular fashion style.

Before planting a tree, what is the best material to add to the soil in the planting hole?

1. Wheaties.  

2. In most cases, nothing.  

3. An arborist.

What is tree wound dressing?

1. A natural fermented product derived from tree wound exudate, sometimes used in salad dressing.   

2. A compound once employed to seal over tree wounds but whose use is now discouraged.  

3. A cloth used to cover a tree wound to keep it clean and warm.

The best thing to fill a tree cavity with is:

1. Reinforcing rods, old water pipes or scrap metal, followed by concrete.  

2. Nothing.  

3. Dental amalgam.

How deep should a tree be planted?

1. The deeper the better.  

2. So its root flare is right at ground level.  

3. Depends on how many arborists you throw in the planting hole.

The root system of a mature tree, in profile, is shaped most like:

1. A carrot.  

2. A plate.  

3. It mirrors the crown in size and shape.

What are tree guys?

1. The ones wearing hardhats and carrying chainsaws, duh.  

2. Wires or cables to temporarily support young transplants subject to high wind.  

3. You mean tree persons, don’t you?

 

What is an underwire tree?

1. A Bonsai tree with an armature of wire embedded in the trunk.

2. A short-maturing tree species or cultivar that can grow under utility wires without interfering.

3. A tree bearing large, voluptuous fruit that require extra support. 

 

You guys know the answers…

Views: 45

Comment

You need to be a member of CornellForestConnect to add comments!

Join CornellForestConnect

Forum

IPhone surveys

Started by Jim Martin in Woodlot Management Jul 11. 0 Replies

Smart phones have GPS.  Has anyone figured out how to use them for mapping wooded land.  I am especially interested in a way to map  my logging trails. Jim MartinContinue

Slash and squirt control of Ailanthus

Started by Mark Horberg in Woodlot Management. Last reply by Kevin Mathers Jun 22. 3 Replies

I have 20-30 ailanthus trees on my property in the 4-6 inch diameter range.  What specific herbicide and concentration should I use for slash and squirt?  Can you recommend a place where it can be purchased in small quantities?  Thanks. Continue

Urban Forestry Presentation Link

Started by Carl DuPoldt in Forest Health May 24. 0 Replies

Urban Forestry Presentation Link ---- …Continue

Stone Walls

Started by Brett Chedzoy in Woodlot Management May 14. 0 Replies

One of my first "real" jobs in forestry in the mid-1990's was in southern New England.  Although I had seen some stone walls here and there growing up in NY, I had never seen stone walls like those of coastal New England.  I remember one property on…Continue

Do Trees Talk to each other? See Video

Started by Alicia Rose in Forest Health Apr 24. 0 Replies

Suzanne Simard: How trees talk to each other | TED TalkVideo for How trees communicate with each other▶ 18:19https://www.ted.com/.../suzanne_simard_how_trees_talk_to_each_…Continue

Forest Health

Started by Carl DuPoldt in Forest Health Mar 8. 0 Replies

Why Logs Are Important ---…Continue

Forest Adaptation Resources Climate Change Tools and Approaches for Land Managers

Started by Alicia Rose in Forest Health. Last reply by Carl DuPoldt Mar 1. 1 Reply

Forest Adaptation Resources: Climate Change Tools and Approaches for Land Managers, 2nd edition link -- https://www.fs.fed.us/nrs/pubs/gtr/gtr_nrs87-2.pdf---------------------Adaptive…Continue

New Forest Farm

Started by Carl DuPoldt in Agroforestry Feb 15. 0 Replies

Welcome to New Forest Farmhttps://newforestfarm.usNew Forest Farm is a diverse Restoration Agriculture research site in the Driftless Area of Southwestern Wisconsin.Founded and stewarded by the Shepard family…Continue

Badge

Loading…

© 2018   Created by Peter Smallidge.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service